Hi.
I hate talking about this but I can't stop letting these negative thoughts interrupt my daily life. I hate my body. And worst of all, I hate it in ways that I can't do anything about. It stops me from doing things. My insecurity limits my happiness. I spend hours deliberating about whether or not I should go out and see my friends, because then I'd have to get dressed and they'd see me and I'd exist outside in the world to be freely percieved. I dread going to work (not just because I don't like my job) because I have to get out of my pajamas and once again be percieved. I kind of wish I could stay in my room forever.
I'm a 5'9 19 year old female (that's pretty tall). I really hate my height. I know it's not even ludicrous on paper, but I'm already such a shy and insecure person. I wish I could shrink down and be smaller; I feel like I stand out. I know I'm not even excessively tall. I just don't like it and I feel that my body doesn't match me at all. I feel that I appear more masculine than I would like, because I'm on the tall side and sort of have broad shoulders.
I know this isn't a real problem so it's sort of embarassing and silly to complain about, but it's something that affects me a lot. I'm so awkward and I feel like I just loom over most people like a big stupid giant or something.
Anyways that's my blown-out-of-proportion qualm for the day. Really not a big deal but feels like the end of the world.