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Forums / Anxiety / Trying my absolute best

Topic: Trying my absolute best

2 posts, 0 answered
  1. PsychedelicFur
    PsychedelicFur avatar
    327 posts
    1 October 2021

    Here is a little clarification. Let me explain ;

    Up until a month or two months ago my father and I were on the verge of homelessness. As we had to sell our house due to my parent’s divorce and we had been applying for places to live but there were many rejections that we faced. Luckily we have a house now!

    So basically I pretty much live in certain cases of poverty. Most times we barely have enough money to pay bills and grocery shopping can be very expensive. Sometimes we resort back to community resources - like food banks: and they help tremendously! So appreciative of them!

    I study at university but I am just concerned that my life will always be like this. I sometimes feel like having goals, ambitions and dreams in my life is a slight waste of time.. because I have grown up in this type of environment all of my life.

    Not much money, so much financial stress and so much hardship..

    I’m a definite high achiever and I study hard. And above all else I am thoroughly invested in my studies. I love learning!

    I just feel like I am experiencing so much unnecessary stress and anxiety, haha don’t we all feel that way though?!

    My mother was psychologically abusive towards me and I’ve had to parent my father, in some ways. Plus I am a misfit and don’t have many friends my age. Plus my first ever proper relationship made me feel unappreciated and undesirable. Seven months no contact with him though! YAY!

    Life is so uncertain and sad. I’m just trying my absolute best. I hope I can achieve my goals and be a better version of myself.

    PF.

  2. tranzcrybe
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    tranzcrybe avatar
    619 posts
    1 October 2021 in reply to PsychedelicFur
    I need to correct one comment you made - to "be a better version of myself".
    You enter this world as the best being without precept, judgement, vanity, greed - these are imposed and cultivated over time through external stimulus.
    Now you are gradually climbing up from this deep well, and even though at times you might feel things aren't moving along, just hanging on there takes a lot of strength and positivity.
    Contrary to what you may be feeling, struggle is not commensurate with defeat.
    Avoid trying to 'change' yourself, but rather shed the superfluous to reveal your true self - this is immutable.
    1 person found this helpful

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