There is no need to reply to this, I know the effort to do so. Simply take it as it is meant -a friendly contact -and leave it at that.
When I saw Sophie_M had been talking with you that prompted me to drop in. Why? Basically I care, you are a person worthy of that in many ways, and that does not change whatever you think or feel.
On reading since I last spoke to you I see you feel pretty bad, with pointlessness rearing its head, and plain simple long term exhaustion physical and mentally a big influence.
So you consider stopping your medical team, maybe you think that wil be easier, maybe you think it does no good, or is just a hassle.
Everyone who has spoken to oyu has suggested you keep on wiht them, Why? Because you are the same person that was capabe of responding to treatment - you said so yourself and that has not changed, merry Covid circumstance introduced another factor, which will lessen as either it dissipates or you get used to it.
To dwell on this 24/7 is harmful, makes every negative thing magnified. So rather than tedious logical argument I'll tell you about my walk, which I can only do sometimes, and is short but stressful and spectacular.
Mrs C drives me to the riverbank car park, where we are accosted by ducks, coots, native hens sand sundry other wildfowl -plus a cook form a neighboring house. Ducks even pedal like mad to get from the other bank and try to push each other out of the way.
We throw stale bread, trying to get some to the chicks, youngsters and outsiders. When hte bag is empty we walk though hte trees, watching the native hens jockey for position wiht the females, and charge each other noisily skwarking in mock attacks until the intruder gives away.