Hi Happy Hippie
Not sure if this will help but I can remember when coming out of my depression some years ago going through a process of letting go of a lot of my identity. It was a sudden kind of shift where I not only dropped a lot of the self limiting beliefs I'd identified with, through most of my life, but also a lot of limiting beliefs others identified me through. The way I identified others changed too.
It's rare I'll ever consider gender, age, appearance and so on. It's strange but it's simply no longer programed into me to identify people in this way, unless I'm led to do it for one reason or another (such as with filling out forms etc). Give me a 4 year old or a 40 year old and I'll identify the sage in them, not their age. Give me a man or a woman and I'll identify the sensitive soul in them, not their gender. Give me someone who appears a certain way on the outside and I'll identify the beautiful person in them, which leads me to see them as entirely beautiful.
I'm wondering whether you're not feeling the need to identify as anything other than who you naturally are. So, if you're naturally a beautiful sensitive sage, there's no need to identify yourself in any other way. Instead work on the beautiful, sensitive sage like aspects of yourself and don't consider too much of anything else, unless the moment calls for it. There are always going to be moments that lead me to consider biological aspects of myself. I'm the woman who gave birth to 2 beautiful souls and I'm also the woman who dislikes pap smears :) All in all, such gender considerations are often rare.
Your natural self may be saying 'Stop focusing on gender so much'. Maybe you're simply tuning in to your natural self at this point in life. Do you think this is a possibility? If you are tuning in more, there's possibly other positive 'messages' your natural self is giving you. Perhaps there are other things you're considering letting go of. Are you getting a sense of wanting to judge less and observe life more, in a more open minded way? The gender issue is possibly a part of an overall process you're facing. Letting go can definitely be liberating, especially when what we've been identifying with relates to beliefs that have brought us down in life.