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Topic: Can people be triggers

2 posts, 0 answered
  1. hopesav
    hopesav avatar
    1 posts
    4 April 2018

    My boyfriend struggles with his mental health.On a few occasions, he has broken down and cried about memories of his closest childhood friends bullying him. This includes verbal and physical abuse. These childhood friends are some of his closest friends now that he is an adult. I have noticed changes in his behaviour whenever he is around these friends. One friend in particular moved away for a few years and has recently come back into his life permanently. He has changed so much this time that I barely recognise him. Can good friends be a trigger for someone's depression?

  2. white knight
    Community Champion
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    white knight avatar
    9783 posts
    4 April 2018 in reply to hopesav

    Hi hopesav, welcome

    I think anything can be a trigger. But male friends among themselves do act differently - its a macho thing. There isn't harm in acting differently among his mates, its a strange humour thing and its enjoyable for men. Don't worry about that.

    As for his bad bullying memories they will take time to fully heal. Not much point in making a topic out of it now unless he is in a good environment like camping and the truth comes out and he tells them the effect of it. But these "bullies" were younger then and not fully responsible for their actions.

    Best for him to accept that these old friends are different than they were.

    It's highly likely they feel much guilt about their behavior but like your man they don't feel comfortable mentioning it.

    Triggers, mostly they remain with us for life.

    Tony WK

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