Hi all,
I'm 59yo and now forcibly retired due to my issues being bipolar 2, dysthymia, depression and anxiety. The anxiety has been licked after 25 years.
I grew up in Melbournes western suburbs but my family came from Tasmania. I was deeply unhappy as a child,cried a lot and didnt understand why. I joined the RAAF at 17 and didnt understand why I'd buy and sell cars so often and didnt fit in with the other guys. I was manic and it wasnt detected. I was suffering from the dysthymia but I wasnt diagnosed fully until 2009 at 54 years old. So I know the feeling of endurance with mental illness, the struggles and the plans to end my life.
Thankfully I also had a positive attitude that arose from motivation lectures and I kind of sprung back into life again.But those 90 cars and 60 jobs with many professions along the way gave me KNOWLEDGE, that I cherish. I may not be able to work but I have this information to spread and assist if I can. Having mental illnesses doesnt mean its all bad news.Mental illness has provided me with empathy, kindness and care, these are the things I can do without feeling drained and tested.Yet if two bills come in the mail at a time I am thrown overboard and need to overcome the stress which takes time.
I've learned that being fickle doesnt mean you are an idiot. Not fitting into groups doesnt mean as you are not a member of a clique you're are abnormal. It all means that that is you and being yourself is ok.You are unique and you are wonderful and too bad for those that think and judge you otherwise.
And it's not all about me.
One of my articles I written here is called "what life's like at the end of the tunnel". It explains the euphoria of surviving into a better world where your illness is managed ok, that your relationship is steady and your day to day life is bordering on normal.
I've also learned a lot since being here on this forum. Some threads rock me, spark me into enthusiasm or make me realise I'm lucky to have "made it".Such a thread was "think b4 you act" by another member.It was a guys great struggle to endure many operations after a suicide attempt.What a member to share it.
So making it to the end of that "tunnel" has it many facets - fun, happiness, reminders of the past and what could have been.
In 2003 I was falsely diagnosed and took the wrong medication for 6 years.Then in 2009 I got a second opinion and never looked back. Life turned around. It can for you to. Here we can be one link in that chain of recovery..
Tony WK