Sounds like you're in the process of incredible reformation, becoming your most natural you. Takes a lot of courage to do this. By the way, it is amazing what happens when we can no longer tolerate not being our most natural self.
Would be interesting to know what you mean by 'obnoxious'. Wondering if you're referring to honesty. Say, in the past where someone would have been rude and thoughtless to you and you wouldn't have wanted to upset them, maybe you internalised their words letting such words impact you. Now, with honesty, you can honestly ask (without any filter) 'What is it that leads you to be so incredibly rude and thoughtless?' Of course, if you asked someone that, they'd most likely be offended. They might refer to you as obnoxious, thoughtless, rude, disrespectful and so on. Do you think your natural self is honest?
The filter aspect can be a challenge to master: How much of a filter to use and under what circumstances do you switch it off. We can filter what we say through personal integrity, through compassion, through self control etc. If someone is arrogantly degrading me roxie, the filter generally comes off and questioning comes in, 'Okay, what leads you to be so messed up in the head that you feel it's perfectly alright to degrade people in the ways that you do? I have to know'.
It is amazing how much wonder can be a natural part of who we are. We can wonder about why others tick the way they do. We can either keep that wonder to our self or we can ask those people straight out, such as with that last example I gave :) I'm imagining you to be a wonderful sort of person, as opposed to defining you as obnoxious.
It's definitely exhausting, using our filter system 24/7, just to please others, when others simply appear to be careless with their filter. I used to be a serious people pleaser too. In some ways it was depressing, letting people treat me how they wanted to without me challenging them. I was an enabler. This might sound weird but I can remember not too long ago thinking 'I wonder if I can just say what I want without thinking (my way out of it)'. I let myself do this and found it incredibly liberating. It's an automatic self esteem booster. I've found, when you question folk, often they feel challenged. Some people, in my opinion, need to be challenged to higher consciousness.
Honesty, wonder and the ability to constructively challenge people to evolve are definitely not flaws, they are super natural abilities.