Hi Sleepy21

I’m sorry that your rich friend has been seemingly insensitive to your suffering throughout lockdown.

I do, however, want to point out that having a stable income or savings in the bank does mean that people aren’t suffering as intensely through lockdown. It may be different to your suffering but real none-the-less.

I have both but am not immune to MH issues, and neither are my family members. MH conditions do not discriminate.

I struggle everyday to support a child with a serious illness. On top of that, I also run a business and have the well-being of hundreds of people and their families to carry. It is my responsibility to keep them going throughout the pandemic and it is huge. I have not slept or eaten properly since I don’t know when.

I worry about their financial well being, their safety and my ability to protect them from Covid. The stress of keeping the business running, meeting my obligations to my workers and continuing to contribute to Victoria’s economy is overwhelming. Having savings in the bank does diminish my burdens.

To say that people like me are flaunting rules to have a holiday is frankly very hurtful. Some might be. Some removalists might also not be wearing a mask. I just don’t know where it gets us as a society to turn on each other and judge each other.

It’s 2 am. I can’t sleep. I Somehow I have to find the strength to get up tomorrow and keep going through a sixth lockdown.

I’m rambling now, time to go.

 

Should have said: Having savings in the bank does NOT diminish my burdens.

So tired, upset and stressed literally can’t see straight.

Needed to come on here after the worst night ever last night at the start of lockdown 6...

I have come to the conclusion that it's best to not look forward to anything anymore, as it just gets taken away from you, and I can't deal with that anymore. And yet the alternative of waking up every morning without anything to look forward to it unbearable. For months I've tried focusing on and appreciating the small things, but even those get taken away.

I'm gutted that the trip I've been planning for months for my 40th birthday is now pretty much certain to be cancelled, but what makes me feel the worst is that this problem seems so petty compared to everything else people are going through. Feeling so upset over missing out on a holiday when so many people are struggling just to put food on the table makes me feel like the most shallow and petty person ever.

Hey all been well over a year since I posted but I really feel this forum helps. Anxiety is off the charts, when I'm home its worse. Not sleeping, I work in a hospital not as a nurse but in the food department. When I'm busy at work I'm not overthinking everything. My daughter is in vce, son at uni but in and out of online learning. So hard to watch them struggling. My mum is well health wise but she lives on her own. Doesn't drive so I help her alot. Pheeeew I'm tired just thinking about it all. I'm so worried about them all, and I have food on the table, still working full time. Thanks for listening

Hey Mermaid, welcome to the forums.

HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY you Spring chicken!
I hope you can find ways to enjoy yourself to the nth degree on your birthday. Hugs.
RADICAL SELF-CARE is a thing!

Hey Sleepy, I hear you. Not having any savings or a good income coming in really adds to the burden with all else during this time. Hugs.

Just popped in against my Counsellor's advice hmmm. It's Friday night during Lock Down, so yeah... too cold to garden lol. Got to stay awake to pick up the kids from work at midnight... it's either this forum or pimple popping clips or this forum AND pimple popping clips.
I'm indulging and doing BOTH.

I'm still working full time, except the 40h week was doubled with same pay.

Lots of craziness happening around me.
I'm grateful I've been able to find the grounding necessary to be "ok" after wild C-PTSD triggering reactions to ppl's words and actions.

My Counsellor said something that really resonated deep in my soul for a few days after our appt...
sic lol.... ".... when we are able to 'live normally' aka going about our usual things, movements etc, we relay on OTHER ppl to co-regulate us. But now since we're in lock down, everyone's feeling stressed and there is NO ONE to co-regulate us properly. SO WE HAVE TO rely on ourselves to self-regulate!"

That was profound for me to hear.
It absolutely helped me 100%!

hope it helps others to hear it too.

Love EM

hi SummerRose,

Sorry that statement hurt you.

Sending support to anyone doing it tough in any way. Definitley not trying to single out anyone's choices of staying healthy and happy and what that means to them. Really sorry those words hurt. I've had my own burdens to bear with these lockdowns, and am struggling a lot myself.

Hope u are doing okay with the many people you support.

mental health doesn't discriminate, but just pointing out my relative has never struggled with mental health issues and her complaints about the fruit shop were not reflective of mental health distress. she called the lockdown annoying and a pain, and i felt personally that my experience was different - that rather than being a pain or an annoyance, it was a serious risk to my mental and physical health, and i was unable to speak of it in those terms as a light bother. Hence my disconnect with her situation.

I am very sorry if it seemed I was saying that rich people dont' hav problems, i know that people of all wealth levels have struggles that deserve being acknowledged. My comment about her being bothered by not being able to travel to the preferred fruit shop, was that I'd like to be in a situation where i can even leave the house at any day and choose a place to buy fruit etc and have choices of any kind. Sorry I can't write too much mor eabout this but hoping you are safe, happy, and okay during lockdowns.

hey golden, have u tried the free month trial with netflix? i'm binging up everythig in lockdown, but i resisted getting it for a long time, because didnt want to be looking at a screen all the time! it has been nice to have stuff to watch, though :) hope ur doing okay there

Hi Sleepy21

I know you meant no harm. I know your words weren’t personal. And I know you are struggling, too.

If I added to your load with my post, I’m really sorry.

I think this period of the pandemic-right now-is the toughest of all. Well, at least for me it is.

My bucket is perpetually full and I seem to be living just to dodge the last drop. Last night, my bucket overflowed. Just context, I know I’m not the only one.

I really appreciate your thoughtful words and understanding.

Kind thoughts to you, always

I’ve come to this thread a few times in the last fortnight, wanting to post because I’m struggling alone in Sydney lockdown, but feeling like it might not be very supportive here. There’s a lot of outrage posts about leaders/lockdown (non)compliance/policy decisions/state vs state. It’s everywhere at the moment, and I’m finding it overwhelming that it’s here too.

I live alone and haven’t seen anyone I know, in person for 6 weeks. My social contacts before lockdown were my psychologist, NDIS buddy/worker and weekly visits to my parents. I’m in one of the hotspot, harder locked down LGAs. I don’t know anyone within 5km (or even 10km) for the single social bubble.

I’m feeling hopeless and frightened by the months of lockdown that are now likely ahead for Sydney, and the thought that I’ll be spending them so isolated. I feel alone in my experience when most others are living with partners, children, friends, or at least housemates. Many still seeing colleagues at work every day.

I know everyone has it tough now for many different reasons. Having social contact is such a basic human need that I’m starting to feel like I’m not a human.

I guess that’s all I wanted to say.

I know I could use the phone line/chat, but I find that hard, and having it confirmed that there’s not actually anything I can do to improve my situation (I’ve already explored this with the help of my psych) is too heartbreaking to hear.

I know how you feel. I live alone in Melb. I have missed the human interactions too. And my favourite thing - getting a massage. Just that human touch.

I know this can feel hopeless. I had many feelings of hopelessness last year. And I get set back each subsequent lockdown. We went from people celebrating a zero day to a lockdown the next.

I've had to try really hard to stay connected but things that I've tried are:

- Social networking app to find friends in your 5km. I used Bumble BFF and met another lady in a park that we both could reach within the rules. We keep our 1.5 between us but it's refreshing to have that in-person interaction. Is that an option for you?

- For friends not in your bubble, an option is to watch movies, eat meals and walk 'together'. I had a partner last year in Sydney and we spent 8months separated by covid. we cooked the same recipes once a week then ate together by FaceTime or pressed play on Netflix at the same time and watched a movie together while also on FaceTime. One time I created a historical tour of his neighbourhood and got him to walk to various landmarks and I'd tell him a bit about eg an old house or monument.

- I joined a free weekly laughing yoga class through Eventbrite. The buzz stayed with me until the next day!

- Local gyms do online classes and they're often cheaper than in person rates. That's a nice way to connect with your neighbourhood.

- Fresh air really does wonders. I know it's a pain wearing a mask outside - but I generally feel much better afterwards.

- Also, some people here like to feel offended when Dr Coatsworth suggested last year that Melburnians should make their beds each day to feel better. I see how some could take it the wrong way but I also understand the value of simple things like this and sticking to a routine. It's strange how I feel a little better in the morning when I leave my room tidy. Are there some items you could put into a list, achievable goals for the day, and feel the satisfaction of ticking them off one by one? Eg 1) Fuss over the cat for a good 5 mins, 2) wash the dishes, 3) call a friend while walking, etc. Or learn one new thing each day?

Also, mindfulness can be great. E.g. count 5 different sounds you hear on your walk or spot 10 things that are the colour red.

Finally, avoid doom scrolling through news. Just find ways to get the info you need and then switch off.

I hope some of this helps.

Go girl! xo

Hello Alexlisa

I understand where you coming from as I am in the situation and it is painful. Our last pandemic was 103 years ago. There is no manual for Covid (Delta) as you know. I also find it difficult as part of my treatment/recovery with my anxiety issues is to get out and about which I cant do in Victoria during so many lockdowns

You made an excellent point re the importance of social contact and thats where so many of us are doing it hard

Being in a current hotspot would be difficult Alexlisa...you speak from the heart....

we are here and are very good listener's too :-)

Paul

I find it’s not catching COVID that is causing the distress

its relationships breaking under pressure

it’s children witnessing their families under stress

its people living with disabilities or illness with no access to their regular supports, routines & services

It’s fear of & actual homelessness after years of working & saving building business etc to lose it all

its A loss of hope - not being able to plan things, go for job interviews or plan financial solutions eg sell your belongings only to go into another lockdown.

it’s feeling helpless with no support.

Its heartbreaking to see families living in their car or loss if lives due to the pressure.

i Have a medical condition & had to stop treatment because we couldn’t get my treatment & drug into the country & then start, stop, start.

tired of lockdowns & not being able to have power over choices or be able to find solutions, to plan a way out & then another lockdown & not qualify for any govt assistance

Alexlisa mentioned having a support worker with NDIS. We live in Vic but were able to have support workers come to our house to assist him. It came under the Care & compassion heading. Obviously you will be restricted to permitted activities with your SW. My husband is blind as well as having other disabilities. He likes going for walks but having someone with him is safer as they can ensure he doesn't get too close to other people to avoid any risk of catching the virus. I'm struggling with yet another lockdown making it impossible to do some of the things that will help me cope with my stresses and MH issues. I try to remind myself that these lockdowns are needed to stop the situation getting out of control as it has in NSW but it is hard.

I thought I'd add a bit of positivity - what are three things you're going to do when this ends (and it will!).

I'm going to fly to Queensland to see an old friend who I've not seen in 10 years

I'll organise a monthly family meal - we don't see each other enough

I'll lie on the beach (even though it's never really been my thing) and soak in some warmth and breath in beautiful fresh, unmasked sea air

xoxo

Amazing.

Saw a clip today on Florida in the US , they're getting 1500 under 15 aged kids , cases a days. Yep , you read right andddd, it's the Delta they're taking about.
So guess what , they're think orrrrrr, we might have to bring in restrictions until more people get vaxed. So , from what l can gather , they aren't even on restrictions. That's just under 15 yr olds, 1500 a day. They didn't even mention the adult cases.

How the hell , l see things like this from all over the world. Tokyo yesterday show full shopping malls and mels , streets , not sure what part it was bc it sure looks empty around the Olympics area . For get the country but Europe , they're thinking they might have to lock down again , 5,000 cases a day and the streets were shoulder to shoulder with 100s of 1000s of people in some festival , literally head to head , not even masked most of them.

How does stuff like this go on all over the world , when we're shutting down for 10 cases a day , even the 300 in Sydney is absolutely nothing , nothing , compared to these places and that was only a few , there are countries all over the world like that right now.

None of it makes sense.

rx

I think one thing we got to bare in mind is, being vaxxed isn’t about not catching it, it’s about reducing the severity of the symptoms and hospitalisation so that if you were to catch it, you’re most likely going to be okay and feel less sick. Our main goal is to not exhaust our healthcare system. Viruses are always tricky which is why we still can’t cure the common cold or even influenza. You let the virus run its course.

its upsetting to see the rest of the world open up and we are going in and out of lockdown indefinitely. Sure we can argue their figures are high but we don’t know how much of these cases are vaccinated. Take UK for example, their figures are bad, but over 50% of the population is vaccinated so unless all those cases are unvaccinated, it shouldn’t be the biggest deal. Maybe that’s why they remain out of lockdown.

sometimes i feel we focus too much on number of cases we forget about other stuff.

i also fear it’ll be harder and harder to reach zero. People are defeated. They are exhausted. Eventually people won’t care anymore and as a result we are going to be in and out of lockdown one after the other indefinitely

hi summer rose, hpe u are takign care of urself. i have always thought that in some ways having wealth and securty can make it harder to talk about Mental health, because ppl will not see the inner pain. thanks for ur message and care. hope everyone is okay.

HI Alexlisa, that does sound tough, and ur heartfelt post resonated with me. thank u for sharing. u are not alone

losing social contacts is so painful and hard. sending care to you, through this hard time, and to everyon in sydney

@benanie: yes, experts did say that if lockdown is too often, people would get the fatigue and it would eventually fail. It has shown over and over again that pursuing of zero is not realistic in a long term. Sadly, it needs some convincing to the risk adverse australia residents at this stage. I see the 4 phases plan. I could only hope that states would come on board than going about what they feel like doing, ie. lockdown as a first resort rather than last when our vax rate is finally up.

@mermaid: i also have the guilt when i think about other people have it tougher.

@MrsG: you have said it all. There are a lot of things in life that has been destroyed by not catching covid atm. But like Benanie has said, australia seems to focus so much on the covid number and forgets about other illness, family relationship etc.

Hi Sleepy :)

Thanks for the Netflix idea. I googled it and it looks like they all do a month free before u start. Glad u are watching some shows. I hope your weekend is okay for u. Remember the little things u like and try inc these. I'm struggling with my agoraphobia. Since our lockdown a couple of weeks back. Thanks for caring. Take care :)

Hi EM

Sorry to read of all the troubles going on for you at present. You don't deserve all that...

Thank you for sharing what your cousellor said to you. I agree with her/ you. And yes it is profound.. to learn to not rely on others and be okay with ourselves. So hard for us with cptsd etc. But definitely wise. To be our own best friend etc. Thanks for sharing this with us. Take care EM x

In the UK cases are rising while they open up but deaths and hospitalisation is mainly the unvaccinated. Everyone over 18 has had the chance to be vaccinated and now they are vaccinating teenagers who are vulnerable or live with a vulnerable person. They provide testing kits for free so you can test yourself before you go to an event. If you show symptoms you must get a PCR test and isolate until negative. My daughter lives there and works in a hospital so my information is both from her as well as official sources.

Getting vaccinated reduces the risk of infection and transmission but it is still possible to catch it. The vaccine almost eliminates the risk of death or serious disease changing it to a very mild illness. Unfortunately Australia has very low vaccination rates so outbreaks will escalate quickly without lockdowns resulting in putting huge strain on hospitals. Hopefully this will change once everyone has the chance to be vaccinated and most people do so.

In the mean time we all need to care for each other and follow the rules as so many are really struggling me included.

MsG 2021

welcome to the forum and this thread .
You have written a comprehensive list of what is distressing people.
Are you experiencing some of the things you have written.?

I’m finding my depression is getting worse during lockdown. The antidepressant I am on is also causing weight gain which is making me feel worse. I’ve decided to come off it.

My psychologist has said she can’t advise me to break the rules but she thinks I need someone to check on me regularly.

Hi Rupes79

You are not alone in anyway. I really hope you can check with your GP before coming off the meds

Great to have you as part of the forum family

my kind thoughts

Paul

Thanks Paul,

I’m not on a high dose. I had a teleconference appointment with my GP. He said his preference is for me to stay on them but the choice is mine and just told me to taper by taking on alternative days for 2 weeks.

I believe everybody should follow the rules to protect each other and even within the rules do whatever is possible to stay as safe as possible and avoid the risk of accidently transmitting the virus. For example we avoid any potentially busy areas or times to walk or shop within our 5km limit.

We also need to remember the rules allow for care and compassion. Each state will write it slightly differently but it means the same. For example a friend's mother had a medical procedure during last years lockdown. My friend stayed with her before and after the procedure to ensure she was OK and assist her with things the mother couldn't manage at the time. This was legal even though it meant travelling outside the 5km limit and visiting someone outside the household. Similarly following the storms here during our previous lockdown I know people were allowed to leave their homes to stay with friends and relatives for their safety.

The same applies to serious mental illness. If you are unsafe at home alone due to your illness you can get someone to assist you or go to someone else for care. Obviously this isn't an excuse if you're just a bit bored or down but if you are really seriously unwell getting support from others is necessary and legal.

hi rupes

if u are ever in antyhing even remotely close to risk to your health and safety please put ur health and safety first

ppl who are living at risk of dv are also allowed to leave their homes and mental health is health.
getting outside is helpful if possible for air or a drink. these times are difficult, i hear u. sending care and support.

Warm welcome to all the new members & posters!

Gosh you're sweet Sleepy lol.

Thanks golden... I didn't mean that magically we could ALL be 100% self reliant.... just found what my Counsellor said to be true. Everyone around us is "losing" their umm minds? grip? heads? So expecting the "norm" from others, it's not going to be there like it was. IF it was! My "circle" of friends lost their minds in last year's Covid entry & lock downs.
My C was prepping me I think. She's going to the U.S. for up to 6 months. Being my only true "support" it'll be an interesting time for me. Another challenge to face head on.

Rx yes. BF said that America is doing away with the whole lock down thing. Whether he's correct or not, it seems to be playing out this way. (Not that I can talk to him much! He has ZERO clue on what we're facing here every single day or me either, no idea & I haven't got the time or MH energy to explain it).
Huge sets of "social experiments" playing out on a world stage.
I'm really trying to focus on my own parameters of work, family, those we support IRL. As per.
THAT alone has increased in intensity around 7000% I'd say. Not fun at all. Horrible.

Continuing lock downs - an email from my boss prepping us for the long haul.
NO NOT prepping us! Demanding more from us!
Like squeezing blood out of a stone for me.
I find some comic relief though, pyjamas on my bottom half and full make up and jewelry on the TOP half, for EVERY Zoom meeting lol. So silly.

Then a short sentence at the end of my boss's email on "looking after our own MH" lol right. What a joke.

I'm having the most intense challenges of BOUNDARIES.

Time to reinforce the Ark!

Love and many Blessings to you all
EMxxxx