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Forums / Staying well / SELF-CARE in challenging times and ANY TIME.

Topic: SELF-CARE in challenging times and ANY TIME.

14 posts, 0 answered
  1. ecomama
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    15 August 2020

    Hello my beautiful BB FAMILY..

    SELF - CARE ugh! I'm going to be all out 100% honest about this term for me, I see it as a 4 letter word x 2 so much worse!

    I fight with this ALL THE TIME. But then .... just sometimes... I DO SOMETHING... then feel a little better that I did lol.

    I TRUST the body of knowledge that our MH care professionals tell us ALL THE TIME about self-care, I do, but I really super struggle with it.

    If you have ANY tips and tricks for the self-care battle please share them.

    I want to swim in the ocean of self-care with all the other self-carers showering care upon themselves and LOVING it.

    How do you do this?
    WHAT do you do?

    In earnest anticipation of us creating our own BB self-care ocean here....

    Love EM

    1 person found this helpful
  2. Maccas100
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    7 posts
    15 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hi Ecomama, thanks for being so honest! Sometimes when I think of 'self-care' I want to stamp my feet like a two year old and scream "I DON'T WANT TO!!" even though I know deep down it 'will be good for me'. Often at the bottom of this feeling is the even more profound feeling of 'I don't deserve to be cared for'. I am not sure if that is what is happening for you - but it's hard to care for ourselves when we're in this space. I have reframed (for myself) a different way of looking at it and ask myself "What will give me the best chance of success?" - of getting through the day, of having a good night's sleep, of feeling physically stronger, of calming my mind, whatever. The end result is usually something that results in 'self care' but it sounds less like a 'should' and more like a 'could'.

    I'm hoping that you can find some words that work for you.

    2 people found this helpful
  3. ecomama
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    15 August 2020 in reply to Maccas100

    Hi Maccas100

    That's me stamping my feet like a 2yo lol.

    That's a really good point about feeling 'deserving'... makes sense recently with the "shame sh**storm" I've been sorting through.

    I often use the "could" rather than "should".... if you say it fast "I'm shoulding on myself" then it is what it sounds like lol.

    I also like your phrase "What gives me the best chance of success?" this is behind-the-toilet-door-noteworthy! It's where the BEST tips go.

    Thankyou for your amazing points, they're super helpful!

    EM

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Jasjit
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    129 posts
    15 August 2020

    Hi everyone,

    The self-care that has worked for me in the hard times and ALL the time is an active lifestyle. I consume a whole-foods plant-based diet, exercise in the gym every day, and meditate and yoga daily. I have felt that basically diet and exercise are not enough - though biologically is enough but to self-care my mind and cognitive state, I perform yoga where I can connect my mind and the body. This kind of lifestyle has really helped me to self-explore myself and I feel so bliss being with myself - I literarily don't feel the need for the other person's presence to make me feel good. I am blissful within myself!!!

    Just wanted to share my self-care strategies. Thanks.

    1 person found this helpful
  5. tranzcrybe
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    15 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hi ecomama,

    So much to contemplate here and thanks for sparking a discussion.

    From your loathing of the term self care, I would be thinking you tend to bundle that in with the likes of fad diets, and get rich quick schemes - nice if it works, but...

    I'd start with the question: How would I define my SELF? ...

    1 person found this helpful
  6. ecomama
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    15 August 2020 in reply to Jasjit

    Oh Jasjit.... I WANNA BE YOU! lol...

    The lifestyle you described DOES sound blissful. How beautiful.

    Would you mind sharing the TYPES of yoga you do to connect your mind with your body?

    The meditations I've been doing take my mind into the quantum field which I absolutely love.
    I "space out" lol.

    Love your post! Thank you!

    Love EM

    1 person found this helpful
  7. ecomama
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    15 August 2020 in reply to tranzcrybe

    Lololol I saw your name tranzcrybe and thought woah here we go.... it's gonna be a challenge!

    Love your mind tranzcrybe.

    Don't really think I put self-care in the bucket of fad diets and get rich quick schemes, but I would LOVE for you to explain that to us!

    Indeed dear tranzcrybe! How would YOU describe your SELF? I'm busting to know!

    I describe my self differently according to the "audience" lol... basically I'm a bunch of atoms.
    To my children I would describe my SELF as their mother and taxi driver amongst other titles.

    Then there's lots in between.

    I'm happy you posted and I'm really looking forward to your next post... I await it in joyous anticipation!

    Love EM

  8. tranzcrybe
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    16 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hi ecomama,

    You have a great (and somewhat challenging) nature yourself - don't ever lose that; I can only ever chuckle at your perceptive candour.

    I am happy to let others describe me, but not to define me - in fact, I would find it impossible to describe my SELF for it has no discernable physical form.

    Differentiating between perception and understanding, I think, is the first step...

    1 person found this helpful
  9. ecomama
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    16 August 2020 in reply to tranzcrybe

    Lololol... hark an Angel has descended from on high... Hi tranzcrybe lol!

    Yah perception of SELF here amongst us humans is probably describing the physical form we inhabit, albeit fleetingly, ... until we change form again.

    Does your indiscernable (not a word lol) "self" eat well, do meditation or is it knowingly connected to the wider quantum field or such?

    Like do you ride a bike?

    Ah I am but a mere mortal in your presence lol.

    EM

  10. Jasjit
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    16 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hey Ecomama!!!

    I am really glad that you found my post helpful!! After experiencing certain changes in myself - I have this strong urge to inspire others and make other people's lives blissful.

    Well, there are several types of yoga that I do but the most basic one is AUM!!

    Here is the link:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TACQ6IvxRw

    This really helps your internal organs to stay calm and then we can proceed to further complex yogas.

    Please tell me how you go. Happy to share more!!

    2 people found this helpful
  11. ecomama
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    16 August 2020 in reply to Jasjit

    Awww wonderful Jasjit!

    Thank YOU!

    I think the first time I "did Yoga" was about 40y ago. It was Satyananda Yoga. Then others along the way.

    AUM sounds GOD like lol. I didn't know there was one called AUM.

    I did HOT YOGA a couple of years ago and it nearly killed me lol. The heaters were up full ball and it was Summer time too... not quite my cup of tea lol.

    I'll pop back to get that link when I can give it a go. THANKYOU!

    That's beautiful that you want to help others..... love that.

    Love EM

  12. RoseQuartz
    RoseQuartz  avatar
    12 posts
    16 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hi Ecomama,

    Self care is very personal. How we identify or value it will vary person to person. By making it authentic it will have a higher impact.

    By introducing routine for self care it makes it less tedious. Less a choir. I.e if it's every day you set 30 min aside or after doing activity A, a self care activity B follows. You will forget that you go out of your way for self care. Bit like if you auto pilot home from work without thought but know you easily did it unconsciously.

    Then the fun stuff... DISCOVERING YOU. Write a lit of things you enjoy already, what things you would like to do for a hobby, personal goals, environmental things you would like or find comforting. Then a week ahead you can slot them into your routine time. As you start to really resonate to a few you will see yourself really embracing the activities. Others you will swap out.

    My examples:

    -I might just give myself 5 minutes of reflection and self praise after doing something emotionally or physically complicated and get zaps of personal comfort and happiness that way.

    -Grounding myself in nature to pause on western style living. Bare feet walking on grass, walk mindfully in a park, watch a sunset etc

    -Something relaxing, get a massage, read a book, yoga, have a bath or try something artsy

    -Socialising: signing up for community based events so i meet more like minded people or see friends/family.

    Hope this helps?

    2 people found this helpful
  13. RoseQuartz
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    12 posts
    16 August 2020 in reply to ecomama

    Hi Ecomama,

    A personal favourite of mine is Yin Yoga. Its is focused on the human organs and releasing tension, stress and helping their functions day to day.

    2 people found this helpful
  14. ecomama
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    17 August 2020 in reply to RoseQuartz

    Dear RoseQuartz lol I love Rose Quartz ... I put it in ALL my babies cribs when they were born.

    I LOVE your points! It all really makes sense to me.

    I've never heard of Yin Yoga... these forms of Yoga do need exploring lol. Maybe DOING also! lol.

    The funny thing is that AS I was reading your posts, I realised that I do do some self care well more than I thought anyway.

    eg I realised recently that I react to even decaf coffee - any of them - with a horrible heavy headache. I've had to avoid coffee for decades for other reasons.
    So I bought a wide variety of herbal teas and have really enjoyed them.

    I'm really into "replacement behaviours"... some people may try to get rid of some type of behaviour and end up slipping back into it because of the void it leaves...
    By replacing it, with something more favourable, the void is filled! It helps me alot.

    Thankyou, they're wonderful ideas.

    EM

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