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Topic: struggling with special needs children

  1. Matchy69
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    16 February 2022 in reply to Hanna3

    Thanks Hanna for your kind words.I just trying be the best parent I can for all my kids and not always successful.I hope you and Sam are doing well.I looking at Sam's happy face and can see how much joy he brings you and well looked after he is.

  2. Hanna3
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    16 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Thanks, Mark. I meant it, you sound such a caring Dad! I'm sorry about your daughter who is having the baby, does she have a caring partner or is she alone? That must be worrying for you.

    Sam has been a wonderful companion to me for ten years now, and I believe in return it's my job to give him the best life I can. He was very happy that day on the beach, playing with a doggy friend of his! The photographer was the husband of a friend of mine, he's a professional photographer, and he took dozens of shots that morning. I love all of them, but I do love how happy and exhausted little Sam looks in that photo!

  3. Matchy69
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    16 February 2022 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna unfortunately my daughter is alone and broke up with her husband middle of last year.He isn't the babies father my daughter me.Shes struggling so much mentally,physically and financially.I did offer for her to stay here but she wants to be independent.I won't push her and just be here for when she needs me.

    I have been in this house 5 years in May and it came with a stray cat who's been the best of company for me over those years and she follows me around everywhere which is so cute.

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  4. Guest_1643
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    16 February 2022

    Hi Mark, I'm sorry Ur daughter is struggling and I imagine that it may be triggering for u to watch her struggle

    I hope she is OK.

  5. Matchy69
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    16 February 2022 in reply to Guest_1643
    Hi sleepy yes it is hard to watch her struggle.She was a special needs child growing up and it was hard at times with her.Everthing seemed to improve for her after she finished school but now she seems to gone back to the old ways and it is very much worrying me.I really don't know what to do and how to help her.
  6. Hanna3
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    I'm sorry to hear that. I don't know if she has other children? Does she have a secure home? I wonder is there any kind of social work support/advice for her - maybe whoever is caring for her during her pregnancy? It sounds a lot for you to deal with alone, and you have the other kids too.

    I love that your cat came with the house! Pets are great.

  7. Matchy69
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Hanna3
    Hi Hanna yes my daughter does have a 5y.o daughter with the custody split with the father.She is renting at the moment but rent is so dear with trying to pay off other debt.She has a bit of support from the hospital and got a food voucher.My daughter works in disability care and earns good money but isn't enough with the debt she's in.
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  8. Guest_1643
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    Maybe u can help her best by just being there, letting her know u can call u any time and Ur just as the other end of the phone....

    I wasnt special needs but I was a difficult kids, my parents gave up on me and my dad told me I should never come in to his house, very sad but he had no heart for me when I was homeless and unwell.

    He didn't like my partner or my chosen friends and abandoned me.

    I think by accepting and loving, u help more than u know.

    U do it for others here and help ppl no matter their background or experience, and letting Ur daughter know u love her is important.

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  9. Matchy69
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Guest_1643
    Thanks sleepy I have been telling her that I am if you need me and talk to to me about anything and I love her.She does adventurally talk and tell me things.I can be here for her when she needs me.
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  10. Guest_1643
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    That'd amazing Mark

    Even if it takes her a while she knows u won't won't hee away and love her.

    Ur support is unconditional

    Kids know and feel that, and it makes them more confident to take risks in the world.

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  11. Matchy69
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    17 February 2022 in reply to Guest_1643
    Thanks sleepy it is just about a matter of being there for them and being judgemental.We all make mistakes in our lives and this is when we need someone the most who cares.
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  12. Matchy69
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    18 February 2022
    Tomorrow will be a big day for my daughter as she will be 18.I made her a cake today and wrapped her presents why she was at TAFE .She is really enjoying Tafe.I gave her driving lesson on the way home.
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  13. Hanna3
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    18 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    That sounds great! Your daughter will be thrilled.

    I'm so glad to hear she's enjoying TAFE, that will really boost her confidence.

    And giving her a driving lesson is a great step too. That's a skill she will probably need in a regional area, and give her more access to employment in the future too. Plus self confidence!

    Sounding good my friend! Cheers.

  14. Matchy69
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    18 February 2022 in reply to Hanna3
    Thanks Hanna and she was talking about applying to do volunteering at the RSPCA now she is 18.Ond day a week would be ok as its an hour's drive from here.Its a relief for me that shes enjoying Tafe.
  15. Guest_1643
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    18 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69
    Sounds great 👍 happy she's got the volunteer prospect and some good options
  16. Matchy69
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    18 February 2022
    Where has the last 18 years gone.I remember this day to well 18 years ago.I took my wife to the hospital at 7am and had the longest day waitimg and at 7.05pm I was holding her for the first time.
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  17. Hanna3
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    18 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Life rushes by too fast Mark! The babies grow up! 🙂

    Volunteering at the RSPCA would be great as she'd get some experience and any future employer would like the fact that she was prepared to do volunteer work.

    Ages ago I was a volunteer worker with the RSPCA in Canberra, I walked the dogs for them, they had a lovely forest nearby that I'd walk the dogs through.

    They were desperate for people to walk the big dogs as most people only wanted to walk the little dogs.

    The big dogs were stuck in cages most of the day. Some of them were terribly traumatised from being abandoned by their owners. It was sad, I wished I could have kept them all! But at least I could take them out for a happy walk.

    Your daughter will be doing very useful work helping to care for these poor creatures.

    It will be good for your daughter to feel useful and know she's helping the animals and the people working there.

    Sounds like your daughter is doing well! 🙂🐕

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  18. Matchy69
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    19 February 2022
    The meeting at the school on Friday sounded a bit depressing.Basically said my son is so far behind the others and can't write that he will have no future at high school and wouldn't even get a high school certificate.By the sounds of it they have given up on him.
  19. Guest_1643
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    20 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Probably more they don't have time or care but I reckon they're wrong to make predictions

    With bit of extra help many kids catch up.

    Kids learn at diff paces, sometimes with reading it just clicks when it does

  20. Matchy69
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    20 February 2022 in reply to Guest_1643
    Unfortunately I couldn't make the meeting yesterday and have to rely on what was said from what my ex told me.I am very disappointed in this meeting and what was discussed.They should have been focusing on what he can do and what measures can be put in place to improve his level of learning.Probably does come down to money.
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  21. Guest_1643
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    20 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Well said....so true,

    Why didn't they set out what they can do, offer, work wirh him on, and show what they are able to provide

    Sounds slack and disappointing

    Is it thr kind of place where they help only certain ppl, and five up on kids? My nephew had an aide and struggled a lot, it was so hard as the school kind of singled him out and his parents, like they didn't want to help him.

    I think maybe Ur right about money

    Does Ur son have any supports outside of the school? I hope he proves then all wrong...

    Einstein didn't even speak til he was 7 years old, we are all different!

  22. Matchy69
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    21 February 2022
    It is getting very worrying daughter is three and a half weeks overdue.Googling it has only made my anxiety worst.I am really worried now.
  23. Hanna3
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    22 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    Is your daughter under the care of a good obstetrician/midwives? Normally if concerned I think they would induce labour.

    Googling these things is always alarming! I hope she has access to good medical/nursing staff who are supervising her well. Perhaps if you are concerned can you speak to her about it?

  24. Matchy69
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    22 February 2022
    My daughter is under the care of the public health system.They just changed from wanting to induce labour to now wanting to leave it as long as possible.It has not been good for my daughter's mental health.I have to question professionals as they do get it wrong.They have with me .
  25. Hanna3
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    22 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    Are you able to talk to the medical staff who are caring for your daughter? I'm not up to date with the issues around her consent for the staff to speak with you, but this would have to be given by your daughter..

    Might be worth speaking to your daughter about it?

  26. Matchy69
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    22 February 2022 in reply to Hanna3
    I had a chat with my daughter tonight about it all.They want to get the baby bigger and then they want to to do a C section.
  27. quirkywords
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    23 February 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    That must be so worrying. Can you get a second opinion with in health system.

    I

  28. Matchy69
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    23 February 2022 in reply to quirkywords
    My daughter is a bit upset as she wanted to have the baby natural.I just said what ever way is safest for you and the baby.
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  29. Matchy69
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    27 February 2022
    My daughter supose to have a phone appointment with Centrelink Tuesday.I don't know how that is going to work.She applied 3 months ago and still no payment.They have just about made it impossible to get a payment.I don't know what else to do
  30. Hanna3
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    2 March 2022 in reply to Matchy69

    Hi Mark,

    How is your daughter at TAFE going? And how is your daughter who is expecting the baby? I hope everything is well with them both. Just thought I'd pop by and see if you had any news of them. Best wishes!

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