Caring for a baby and mental health (birth to 12 months)

Caring for a new baby is rewarding and it can also be hard work. Especially at first.

For any parent raising a baby, there are likely to be new challenges and lots of times when you don’t quite know what to do. Remember, this is the same for everyone.

It's important to be aware of your own mental health and to do what you can to support your wellbeing. This can help you care for your baby in the first 12 months.

Illustration of father and grandmother dressing a baby

Illustration of grandmother holding a baby and father holding baby clothes

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Bonding with your baby

Most parents expect to bond immediately with their baby. It doesn’t happen like that for all parents.

The attachment can grow over a few days, weeks or months. It can happen as you care for your baby and begin to understand their needs.

You can bond with your baby over everyday interactions. Soothe them to sleep, cuddle them at feeding and bathing times, and play with them.

Find out more about bonding and attachment on the Raising Children Network website.

Getting enough sleep

If you have a new baby, it’s very likely that you will be sleep-deprived.

Most newborns sleep in short bursts of 2 to 3 hours throughout the day and night. This can vary from baby to baby.

A lack of sleep can leave you irritable, fatigued and feeling less able to cope with the new demands in your life.

Visit the Raising Children website to learn about sleep routines for:

newborns
babies from 3 to 12 months.

It’s not always possible, but it’s worth finding ways to catch up on sleep. You can try:

sleeping in for an hour or 2
napping when your baby sleeps (it’s okay to let chores slide some of the time)
asking for help with housework and cooking meals so you can use the time to sleep
getting support with night feeds (if you’re breastfeeding, consider expressing and storing breast milk for this)
taking turns with your partner or a trusted person to watch the baby so you can nap or sleep in
trying to enhance the quality of your sleep by eating well and being active as best you can.

Find sleep tips for new parents on the Sleep Health Foundation website.

Feeding

Newborns need to feed at least 6 to 12 times a day.

Feeding your baby over this 24-hour cycle can leave you feeling tired.

If your baby isn’t feeding or putting on weight as you expect, you might also feel worried or stressed. If so, it’s important to seek reassurance and help.

Your maternal and child health nurse or GP can offer advice and support.

For support with breastfeeding, contact the Australian Breastfeeding Association.

Find breastfeeding and bottle-feeding information and support on the Raising Children Network website.

Crying

Crying is a normal part of your baby’s development.

It’s how they let you know they’re hungry, want to be held or need a nappy change, among other things.

It’s important to comfort a crying baby so they feel safe and nurtured. This also means that a crying baby who doesn’t settle can be distressing, tiring and confusing for parents.

If your crying baby shows signs of illness or has a fever, seek medical attention.

If your baby is healthy but you feel overwhelmed by their crying, remember

all babies cry
crying comes and goes
it can stop as quickly as it began
it’s okay to leave the baby in a safe place (a cot or baby seat, for example) and step away to calm yourself down
you can call on your partner, or a friend or family member, for help.

Understand why babies cry and how to soothe them on the Emerging Minds website.

What can affect your mental health as a new parent

Getting used to being a parent and caring for a new baby can be hard work even when things are going well.

Throw in exhaustion or an unsettled baby, and you can soon find yourself stressed.

Other factors that can impact your mental health include:

a stressful or unplanned pregnancy
obstetric complications in the past, including fertility problems
a very long labour or complicated birth
severe ‘baby blues’ after the birth
difficulty with breastfeeding
a premature baby or problems with your baby's health
an unsettled baby
ongoing lack of sleep or rest
being a single parent
being a teenage parent
being the parent of more than one baby (that is, having twins or triplets)
financial stress
relationship difficulties.

Caring for a baby can also feel more challenging if you have a pre-existing mental health condition, are prone to feelings of anxiety or tend to be self-critical.

Talk to friends and family or contact a health practitioner for support.

Find more tips to look after your emotional health on the COPE website.

Find parent helplines and hotlines on the Raising Children Network website.

Postnatal depression and anxiety

Postnatal depression and anxiety is depression and anxiety that happens after giving birth to a child.

It can develop between one month and up to one year after birth.

The symptoms of depression and anxiety in early parenthood are the same as at any other time in our life. Yet, they are complicated by the task of raising a baby.

Symptoms can be even harder to identify when you’re fatigued and sleep-deprived from looking after your baby.

Looking after your mental health and wellbeing

The demands of caring for a baby can feel like they take over your daily life.

Looking after your mental health and wellbeing is likely to require more consideration than it once did.

If you’re unsettled or struggling with caring for your baby, seek support early.

You can talk to family, friends or a healthcare professional.

Take the anxiety and depression test (K10).

Look after your mental health with our Wellbeing Action Tool.

Get mental health support.

Supporting someone caring for a baby

New parents aren’t just learning how to care for a baby.

They’re also dealing with big changes to their relationships, routines, bodies and mental health and wellbeing.

Your support and help can make a difference to their mental health.

Tips for partners

A new baby will change your relationship. Be guided by your partner on what sort of support they need.
With all the attention and demands on the birth parent, you might feel left out. Talk to your partner about how you can become more involved.
Come up with a plan for how to support each other during the times when the baby won’t stop crying or won’t sleep.
A shorthand code for expressing feelings might come in helpful. For example, saying “I’m a 3 out of 10 today” takes less effort than trying to explain exactly how you’re feeling.
Usually, renegotiating your sexual relationship after the birth of a baby takes time and care. How to do this will be unique to your relationship. Communication and patience can help.
Look after your physical and emotional health. By supporting your own wellbeing and being present, you help your baby to feel safe and secure.

Caring for a baby and mental health (birth to 12 months)

On this page

Subscribe to receive info about mental health, keeping well and stories from our community.

Bonding with your baby

Getting enough sleep

Feeding

Crying

Supporting your baby’s development

Seeking support for your baby

What can affect your mental health as a new parent

Postnatal depression and anxiety

Looking after your mental health and wellbeing

Supporting someone caring for a baby

Tips for partners

Further resources

How babies develop socially and emotionally

Get urgent support

The baby blues or depression?

Signs and symptoms of postnatal depression

Signs and symptoms of postnatal anxiety

Tips for family and friends